Ok, I'm going to be ultra cliched here and state that yes, I never thought it would happen.

Anyway, at about 8.00pm today, I went to dinner with my mom and dad and some local restaurant. We were just eating and chatting when a young man - probably late teens or early 20's - casually walked into the restaurant, came up to my mother and SNATCHED HER HANDBAG FROM HER LAP. She shrieked, creating a commotion as the f*cker ran out while my dad, myself and a few others tried to chase him. A few metres outside the restaurant, jumped on a motorcycle with his accomplice on it and sped away.

We took down the number plate of the motorcycle and quickly finished our dinner (which we had just started eating at that point) as the restaurant owners called the police. My father also called using his handphone. Calling an emergency number, you'd think you get an instant response. But nooooooo... they said hello and put him on hold for a whole 3 minutes. Seriously, if anyone was injured, they'd be dead already. Anyway, we figured we'd be going to report it in person anyway so ended the call. Who knows, it might've been another 2 minutes on hold... maybe 5... heck, just put us on hold for 10 minutes, nothing seems urgent even if it's an emergency number. While eating, a waitress told us that it had happened A FEW TIMES at a hawker centre across the street where the thieves would snatch bags just as people were getting into their cars. As you guys know, it's not the money that is the worst part of being robbed - it's the hassle of replacing all your credit cards, IC's, atm cards and whatnot. And for my mother, she has chronic athsma so she carries around athsma medicines all the time.

I decided to SMS my mother's handphone (which was in her bag) asking the thieves to return the things in the bag like her medicine, credit cards and atm cards. No reply. So we leave the restaurant and drive to the police station downtown. In the car, we got the message "kalau u nak balik itu semua u pegi pos office bawa wang tunai rm 10ribu" - "if you want all your things back, go to the post office bringing RM10 thousand in cash". Whoa, interesting. Although I doubted they would be that stupid, there still might be a chance to get her stuff back, right? So we hurried to the police station, hoping that we could somehow ambush these asshats. To stall, we replied that it was at night and banks were closed, so we can't come up with that kind of money.

So we get to the police station, in an area that seems more like a ghetto than a city centre. A soft-spoken Cik helped us fill in a report. Interesting to note that halfway through filling in the report she had time to make 2 phone calls the conversation of which, I took careful note:
"Hello... Apa khabar, ya!... Aku OKlah...Itulah, kerja sampai pukul 12, tahu tahu pun mesti kat sini lah" etc. A model of ethical use of the telephone in public office buildings. We got there at 8.45pm and how long did she take to type my mother's statement? 15 minutes. 15 minutes for 10 LINES. And it's basic, simple sentences like, "X amount of money stolen at X time at X" which is mostly based on some template the Malaysian police probably use seeing that even the clerk herself claims to fill these reports several times a day.

After filling it in, we were directed to the officed of SIO:2... sounds pretty nifty right? We were even told to see Sergeant Othman. So we went. And waited. No sign of him. Waited some more. Still no sign although an officer from across said that he couldn't be gone for long cos his glasses and paperwork were still on the table. So we waited. AND F*CKIN WAITED SOME MORE. The other officers in SIO:2 (curiously enough, only 2 people were in the office the entire hour we were there, could explain why they're called SIO:2 instead of SIO:17) had only to say that they couldn't "help" us because they were in charge of different areas of the city. Being the chivalrous and intelligent men they are, they referred us to a piece of yellowed paper tacked to the wall which had the elusive Sergeant Othman's phone number - in indecipherable handwriting, no less (have to wonder how they can shoot a gun when they can't even hold a pen). Called him, no answer. It was already 10pm then and we couldn't officialy finish the report until we see him (apparently it's the procedure to fill report, have a sergeant take statements and attend to your case). Well, I'm sorry but I can't be freakin bothered to wait over an hour at the desk of someone who is ON DUTY AND SUPPOSED TO BE THERE at that time. Frustrated, angry and annoyed, we just left a copy of a statement on his table and left.

The motto of the Royal Malaysian Police is "Mesra, Cepat dan Betul" - Courteous, Fast and Right . I think a more suitable motto which would more accurately reflect their commendable work ethic would be "Malas, Cuai dan Bergabra" - Lazy, Careless and Confused.